Virgil quite rightly pointed out in a comment to my post last week that pissing people off just for the sake of pissing people off is not a good idea. I was referring to Kevin Holland’s post that was arguing not really in FAVOR of angering people, but for being distinctive enough that you should expect some people to not like you or what you are saying.
Signals v. Noise just put up a post along the same lines. Here are some snippets:
Companies that lead need to be willing to say that occasional growing pains are ok. If a company only listens to what customers think they need, it won’t be able to innovate. As Henry Ford said, “If I’d asked people what they wanted, they would have said a faster horse.”
Of course, that doesn’t mean you can just be a dick about it. You’ve got to explain to people what’s happening. This is where trust and communication are key. If you have a conversation with your customers, they know where you’re coming from. They know what you stand for and why you make the decisions you make.
…
The worst thing a CEO or the head of engineering can do is to overreact whenever a customer, even an important customer, demands a new feature or insists on a new service—especially if that new feature or service risks cluttering the simplicity of the offering. In other words, one of the most important jobs of a leader or an entrepreneur is knowing when to say no—even to important constituencies.
Jamie, good and important points to be sure. No organization or individual, of quality, can be everything to everyone–which is a contemporary challenge, particularly for IMOs and their staffs. We have challenges from every quarter.
I’d respectfully suggest, however, that knowing when to say no (as important as that is) may not be nearly as important as knowing how to say no without losing a colleague, or creating an enemy.
In my experience, some people can recognize when it’s important to say no, but a lot fewer can do it in a way that maintains respect and relationships. That’s the true test, don’t you think?
Amen, Virgil!
Maybe I’ll come up with a new post out of this, because while I agree that “fewer can do it in a way that maintains respect and relationships,” I still don’t think it is nearly as hard as we think it is. It is possible to maintain respect with a strong “no.” I don’t think you were implying otherwise, it just got me thinking.
Someone I highly respect said to me once, “It doesn’t matter how much people like you; it matters how much they respect you.” Wise words, I thought.