I did some work last week with a volunteer group that was half way through it's year of activity. They were at a point where they wanted to look back at how the experience has been going so they could make adjustments for the second half of the year. So at the beginning of my time with them, I had them write down to lists: Awesome and Suck.
What has been awesome about this volunteer experience so far, and what has really sucked about it?
I chose the words intentionally, particularly the word "suck." I've been in organizations where they don't want to acknowledge problems, because it sounds like a bad word, so they talk about their "challenges" instead. This bugs me. I think word choice matters, and that's why it bugs me–I prefer choosing words that reflect truth. I feel no need to cover up something that is negative, if that indeed what is going on.
Some times, in our teams, or in our volunteer efforts, or in our families–things really suck. They are bad. They are not working. They need to change. I think we're all better off when we talk about it, because that is the first step to doing something about it.
And here's the other trick: when you talk truthfully about the negative, and people don't hold back, you will often see that the "complaints" in the negative column are reflecting a desire for something better. There was a direct connection between the theme in the suck column and the theme in the awesome column. If we can take care of the biggest things in the suck column, we will get more of the best of the awesome column. When you get to that point, you will see a group that is really motivated to deal with their problems, even if we didn't start by calling them "challenges."